Say Yes to Our Female Greatness
Yesterday I attend the art exhibit Wack! at the National Museum of Women Art http://www.wackatnmwa.org/. I was specifically moved by Joan Semmel’s painting “Erotic Yellow.” It is a painting of a photograph of the artist nude with her lover. This artist and others in their time were criticized for their narcissism. A quote was placed on the wall referring to Freud’s theory on narcissism and how a woman’s greatness is denied. I wish I had written down what Semmel had said.
A male friend who loves me dearly is hesitant to acknowledge aspects of my greatness for my own benefit he believes. As he always says, “I don’t want to feed your ego.” Are women really still seen as dainty having a need to keep them in their place so their greatness is not recognized? What is wrong with a woman having an ego of high regard of oneself? Why is its threatening? It still surprises me and makes me feel small that if I am overly self-assertive or self-confident I am called “Cocky” in the workplace and told to tone it down. I internalize it as if I am being wrong, wrong for being myself and great.
My male friend says that greatness should not be self acknowledge but validated by others. I say when aspects of society are constantly making you feel small it is up to us to find that inner strength, that inner greatness, that inner truth.
Strong women have always been labeled in America, as long as I have been alive. But also, strong men have been labeled. Each differently, of course. I like to consider where the label has come from. Usually that gives us more information and something we can use if we are doing any self analysis. Which is never a bad thing.
I have felt as your describe. Over the years I can say that I don’t take it personally anymore, unless it is from a loved one. In the workplace, it is usually about something more. Finding out what the bigger issues are, usually allow me to function in the situation without emotions, just objectively.
I agree with your male friend in that acknowledgment is sweeter when it comes from w outside ourselves.
But there is nothing wrong with self acknowledgment. It is necessary.
Marlene
November 20, 2007
I think it takes some courage to name this: that we need to name our greatness.
As an English woman struggling post menopausally with my own value, it is heartening to hear of being reminded to open to the possibility of our greatness. As a woman said; we are more afraid of our light than our darkness
Caroline Born
February 11, 2009